“Your father doesn’t play games of chance, he complains he’s unlucky,” explained Long Suffering Wife to the Littlest Princess the other night. This is true. I haven’t played cards since the great Gin Rummy annihilation of ’93, and that’s all I have to say about that.
Anyway, once The Littlest Princess showed me that her new game was all about skill I joined in. The premise was simple, line up four round coloured discs, while trying to stop your opponent from doing the same; a little like Noughts and Crosses on steroids. Things didn’t go well from the start. After eight games, I was eight games down.
Sitting up, I cracked my knuckles and thought, ‘Right, time to take the Little Bat to town.’ I punched those chips into their slots like a man on a mission, and a few minutes later I lined up four of them and said loftily, “Well darling, how do you like them apples?” She shook her head, “I don’t like those apples very much at all Dad.”
Pointing at the notepad I said, “Alrighty, put a mark on my side of the score card, and brace yourself for another beating.” She smiled and pointed at the board, “Actually Dad, I won the game three moves ago but you didn’t notice.” I gawped at the board and saw that this was indeed true, “Why didn’t you say anything!” I blurted.
“You were having so much fun I let you keep going. So how do ‘them’ apples taste Dad?”
Now, the details of what happened next are a little blurry, but I vaguely recall standing up to congratulate her, when all of a sudden my foot came into contact with the board at high speed. As pieces of the game rained down around us, Long Suffering Wife entered the room and gave me ‘a look’. I helped the Littlest Princess to her feet, removed a playing chip from her left nostril and patted her on the back, “Well done luv!” I said, then limped off to the beer fridge.
I’ve since promised her that once we find all the pieces, we’ll definitely play again. But at this point my half hearted searches have only turned up some old Yahtzee dice, Bingo buttons, and many, many screwed up playing cards. The missing coloured chips remain hidden, and I’m hoping my luck holds out for a bit longer!